Within 17


It’s 3 a.m. and caffeine is in my blood.

My body is tired, so is my mind.
Unlike my body resting in the bed,
my mind won’t retire,
wanting to be free.
Maybe it’s caffeine, it separates your mind from exhaustion.
Because when the mind gets its chance, it will never stop thinking.
From the feeling of hunger to you who I think of.
My mind won’t rest until it gives up.
The mind hears voices not from this world.

Every mind does.

Such voices are inevitable,
using your mind,
planting seeds in your mind,
crumbling your mind.
Your mind wants to vanish the voices but it can’t do anything.
Even if you sleep, for sure tomorrow they’ll be back.

No, you just want to stop thinking.

You exhaust your mind until nothing comes out of it.

You just want to end the pain of cyclic remembrance of the things you’ve done.
You just want to stop the agony you caused.
You just want to think of nothing.
You just want to be nothing.

You just want to use up the remaining caffeine.
3:17 a.m.