I had a dream.
I had a dream about me falling from the sky.
I had a dream of feeling the winds seemingly passing through every part of my body.
Free falling. A thing some people would really want to try.
Being with you for the past years of my wandering life, was free falling. The kind I would really want to try.
Thousands of feet up above, floating like some lost balloon. Left out to just fly aimlessly. Go up until I can’t, or be blown by the ever-changing blows of the wind. Becoming weightless and senseless. Until my view of the ground is just white, blue, some greens. Until the ground curves into the atmosphere. Until I realize that down there is more of Earth, more of them. One less of me. Up high I am alone, isolated from below.
There was me wishing I could get back on the ground. Feel its solidity. Feel its richness. Feel its warmth. But how? How when all you can do is go up and float? Becoming weightless. No gravity.
Then you grabbed me. Pulled me down. I felt you asking me to go ground. You helped me stop floating. You were my weight. You gave me back my sense of gravity. Being with you is gravity. Making me feel all of down there, all of Earth, once again. With you, I belong.
Yearning for the feel of the soil under my feet, I held on to you. Giving me back my own weight. My own me. I will be back. I am part of them.
But as I regained myself, so is the thought of me falling hard. My regained sense doubled our speed downward. Free falling faster as we approached the ground. Free falling to the thought of me going back. Free falling to the assumption that once we hit ground, you’ll be gone. Free falling.
For a second I wished to be back up there again. Weightless. Senseless. Non-existent on Earth. Until you told me, the ground is where you belong. It is where you have gravity. It is where we have you. It is where you have you.
So I closed my eyes. Felt the last seconds of free falling, with you. My life has been leading to this free falling. It was meant for me to free fall with you.
At that moment, I decided. You decided. We decided.
We took the fall.